There’s no greater symbol of teenage independence than a driver’s license. At least that’s how it’s always been. But a change is slowly taking place as general anxiety and a lack of motivation settle in over the newest generation of would-be drivers. While many teens still eagerly practice maneuverability, there’s a rising number of kids who elect not to get their license.
“It used to be a rite of passage but it’s somewhat diluted,” says Dr. Luis Amunategui, PhD of University Hospitals Behavioral Health Institute.
Since COVID Amunategui has noticed that teens are showing greater social withdrawal. Furthermore, access to cellphones and the internet mean teens no longer need to leave the house to connect with their peers and friends.
“There’s always been a subset of kids I treat that are anxious [and] who have low interest in learning to drive…But now there is also a lack of eagerness that is evident in teens,” Amunategui says.
Amunategui isn’t alone. Greg Anderson, founder of All Star Driving School and Teach With A Pro, agrees. “We have to identify what the reluctance is,” he says. “Sometimes they don’t want to put in the effort because they don’t see the need to drive. A lot of time, the people who are anxious to drive are fearful because they don’t think they can handle the information or they had a bad experience with someone teaching them to drive.”
A parent’s approach to learning to drive makes a huge impact. Focusing on the positive aspects of learning—the excitement and independence—while also working to reduce the pressure to drive right away and eliminating high-stakes situations can go a long way.
Amunategui recommends parents, “talk about this as a privilege and a skill that makes life so much better and richer. Parents create this expectation that we want you to develop this skill, while still having the mindset that it’s a gradual skill.”
However, even when parents employ high-positivity, low-pressure, family dynamics are a frequent roadblock and sometimes the best approach can be to step back.
“The main thing I would ask parents to consider is that the best instructor is not a family member. Get yourself out of the family teaching loop,” recommends Amunategui.
This dynamic is so common Anderson launched Teach with A Pro, an online subscription series of short videos, all dedicated to teaching new drivers critical skills before ever getting behind the wheel.
Anderson’s goal is to provide a third-party expert so teens are less likely to question their parent’s judgment and authority. By watching the videos together, parents and teens can practice skills or address any questions. The series is especially effective if families watch prior to the teen starting drivers’ education so they are equipped with knowledge before being put on the spot by an instructor.
The expert guidance on the videos also helps parents close the gap between what their teen needs to know and what they may not remember or think to teach. Anderson asks parents, “How much information did you forget about driving and how do you communicate something you forgot or don’t think is important? Driving becomes watered down if the parent is teaching without expert help.”
Another major tool in combating driving anxiety is to break it down into manageable parts.
“One of the best ways for parents to help someone who has anxiety about driving is separating out the skills—car control skills, scanning and hazard recognition, and critical decision making-skills,” Anderson says.
It’s much harder for a new driver to learn to make a left hand turns on a road when they’re also expected to scan for road signs, notice other drivers, unexpected dangers, and maintain a speed limit all while understanding how far and fast they need to turn a wheel without hitting a curb.
Instead, Anderson teaches car control in an isolated environment—by having drivers practice figure 8’s in an empty parking lot.
“There’s no danger, they can get up to 15-20 miles per hour and can practice turning both ways. The pressure is gone and they are often ready to try driving on the road so much sooner,” he says.
He also utilizes the “I do it, we do it, you do it” approach to hazard recognition and critical decision making. With the teen as the passenger, parents and instructors first narrate what they are doing. For example, when coming to an intersection the driver can tell the student that they notice it’s a four-way stop, when to begin slowing down, the position of the other cars, when they use their turn signal, where they notice a crosswalk, and so on. Later, the student is asked to point all of these out. Anderson even recommends students point out all the white cars they see on the road.
Once teens have mastered the skill of visually scanning surroundings they can then practice critical decision making in a no-stakes scenario by telling the driver what to do in a given situation.
“We want to turn them into the worst backseat driver in the world,” Anderson says. “You want them telling you everything to do and what you should be doing. We’re building habits and awareness. It reduces the stress for when it’s their turn. It truly works wonders.”
By setting positive expectations, removing pressure to drive immediately, breaking lessons into manageable parts, and bringing in experts, it can help parents be a major ally in building their teen’s confidence and helping them to be safer behind the wheel.
“I would love to tell every parent this one thing,” Anderson says. “I would much rather have my kid driving than them being a passenger of another kid driving. Because you don’t know what the other kid knows or learned.”
